I Woke Up HANDCUFFED To My Best Friend After The Bachelor Party
I woke up with the worst headache of my life, and someone’s knee jammed into my thigh.
At first, I thought I was still drunk.
The room spun when I opened my eyes, sunlight stabbing through half-closed blinds straight into my skull.
There were empty beer cans all over the hotel floor, somebody’s sock hanging from the TV, and the stale smell of whiskey and sweat clinging to everything.
Normal bachelor party aftermath.
What wasn’t normal was the cold metal digging into my wrist.
I frowned, lifting my arm slowly, and that’s when I heard a groan beside me.
Dude, stop moving.
My stomach dropped.
I turned my head and came face-to-face with Harvey, my best friend, and attached to me by an actual pair of handcuffs.
For three full seconds, neither of us spoke.
We just stared at each other, squinting through our hangovers like our brains physically couldn’t process what we were seeing.
Then Harvey looked down at our wrists, then back at me.
Then he muttered, “What the hell?”
I yanked my arm instinctively.
The cuffs snapped tight between us, and Harvey cursed loudly.
“Cavlin, stop.”
“I’m sorry.”
I snapped, panicking.
“Why are we handcuffed together?”
“That’s what I’m trying to figure out.”
We both sat up too fast and instantly regretted it.
My head pounded.
Harvey leaned forward with his eyes squeezed shut, one hand pressed to his forehead, while the other remained chained to mine.
The blanket slipped off his chest, revealing he was shirtless.
Actually, I looked down at myself.
So was I.
“Why are we dressed like this?”
I asked carefully.
Harvey looked down, too, then immediately grabbed the blanket again.
“Okay.
Nope.
Don’t like that.”
My pulse started racing.
Harvey and I had been best friends since freshman year of college.
Six years of knowing each other meant I’d seen him drunk, stupid, emotional, reckless, and occasionally unconscious.
But this this was new.
“Do you remember anything?”
I asked.
He blinked slowly.
“I remember the strip club.”
“Same.”
“I remember Tyler crying because he said marriage means the death of freedom.”
I snorted despite myself.
“Yeah.”
“Then you bought him six tequila shots.”
Harvey pointed at me.
“Correction.”
“We bought him six tequila shots.”
“Fair.”
Bits and pieces started coming back.
Loud music.
Tyler screaming karaoke.
Somebody losing money at poker.
Harvey with his arm around my shoulders laughing so hard he nearly fell over.
But after that nothing.
Harvey shifted beside me and suddenly froze.
“Oh, no.”
“What?”
He looked toward the opposite side of the room.
I followed his stare.
Two of the other groomsmen were passed out on the floor.
One was using a pizza box as a pillow.
And standing near the bathroom door, fully awake and holding a phone up at us, was Tyler.
The groom.
Tyler grinned wickedly.
“Morning, boys.”
“Oh my god.”
Harvey groaned.
“Tell me this is fake.”
Tyler burst out laughing.
“Absolutely not.”
“You handcuffed us together?”
I demanded.
“Nope.”
“Then who did?”
Tyler zoomed in with his phone camera.
“You guys did.”
The room went silent.
Harvey and I turned slowly toward each other.
“What?”
Tyler walked closer, still filming us like a nature documentary.
“Around like 2:00 in the morning, you both disappeared after arguing about whether you could survive a road trip together without killing each other.
That sounds accurate.
Harvey muttered.
Then you came back downstairs wearing novelty cop sunglasses and announced that your friendship was ride or die.
I stared at him blankly.
Tyler continued barely holding in laughter.
Then Harvey found handcuffs.
Harvey pointed at himself immediately.
That sounds like something Calvin would do.
Oh, shut up.
You literally once bought a traffic cone because you said it looked lonely.
That was different.
Tyler was wheezing now.
Anyway, one of you cuffed yourselves together and then dared the other one to stay handcuffed until check out.
Harvey rubbed his face.
Please tell me we at least know where the key is.
Tyler’s grin faded slightly.
That was enough to make my stomach sink.
Tyler.
See, funny story.
Tyler.
Nobody knows.
Harvey dropped backward onto the bed dramatically.
I’m going to kill myself.
I laughed before I could stop myself.
Harvey looked over at me instantly annoyed.
This is your fault.
How is this my fault?
You have chaos energy.
That’s not a real thing.
It absolutely is.
Tyler kept filming while I tried not to smile.
The stupid thing was even with the migraine and confusion, this already felt like one of those stories we’d laugh about for years.
That was the problem with Harvey.
Even disasters became fun with him around.
I’d realized that a long time ago.
Which honestly was frustrating sometimes.
Because Harvey was unfairly attractive.
Not in a model way.
Worse.
In a real way.
Messy dark hair.
Strong arms.
Crooked smile.
That stupid deep voice that somehow always sounded half amused.
He was the kind of guy who made people instantly comfortable around him.
Girls loved him.
Guys loved him, too, honestly.
And me?
I’d spent 6 years pretending I didn’t notice the way his shirts rode up when he stretched or how he always touched me casually when he laughed.
Because Harvey was straight.
Very straight.
At least, I thought so.
“Okay,” Tyler said finally.
“Good news is checkout isn’t until noon.”
“That’s not good news,” Harvey said.
“The better news is I found your phones.”
He tossed them onto the bed.
I reached for mine automatically before realizing Harvey had to move with me because of the cuffs.
Our shoulders bumped together awkwardly.
The contact shouldn’t have affected me as much as it did, but my body was suddenly way too aware of him, especially because either of us had shirts on.
Harvey noticed, too.
I could tell by the brief hesitation in his movements.
Just 1 second.
Then he cleared his throat and reached for his phone.
“We need coffee,” he muttered.
Tyler smirked.
“You also need to see the storys from last night.”
“No,” Harvey and I said at the exact same time.
Tyler’s grin widened, which meant we were absolutely screwed.
Tyler wasn’t exaggerating.
The storys were bad.
Like career-ending bad.
Harvey and I sat shoulder-to-shoulder on the edge of the hotel bed while Tyler cast everything onto the TV like he was hosting movie night from hell.
The first clip opened with loud music and blurry flashing lights.
Then my drunk voice yelled, “That’s my best friend.”
The camera swung wildly and landed on Harvey standing on top of a poker table with sunglasses on indoors and a beer raised over his his “And this,” Harvey shouted dramatically, pointing at me, is my soulmate.
The room exploded with drunken cheering.
I buried my face in my free hand instantly.
Oh my god.
Tyler was crying laughing.
Wait for it.
Video Harvey jumped off the table badly, stumbled into me, and nearly took us both down.
Instead of recovering like normal people, we apparently decided to slow dance in the middle of the suite while everybody screamed.
Present-day Harvey stared at the TV in horror.
Why are we holding eye contact like that?
The clip honestly made my stomach twist a little.
Because we were.
Even drunk out of our minds, there was something weirdly intense about the way Harvey had looked at me.
His hands were on my waist.
Mine were around his shoulders.
We were laughing, but not really laughing at anyone else.
Just each other.
Then Tyler skipped ahead.
The next clip showed us in the hotel hallway.
You two are idiots.
Someone behind the camera was saying.
No.
Drunk Harvey corrected proudly.
We’re a unit.
Ride or die.
I added.
Then the camera zoomed down to the handcuffs.
Oh my god.
Harvey whispered.
We really did this ourselves.
Tyler paused the story with a wicked grin.
You want to know the best part?
No.
We both answered again.
You made out with the ice sculpture.
I blinked.
Harvey blinked.
What?
Tyler immediately started another clip.
Sure enough, there we were in the hotel lobby beside a decorative ice sculpture shaped like a swan.
Drunk me was dramatically dipping Harvey backward while Harvey laughed so hard he could barely stand.
Then I kissed the ice sculpture.
Then Harvey kissed it, too.
Then somehow Harvey accidentally kissed my jaw instead.
The room fell quiet.
It only lasted maybe half a second in the story.
But I felt it all over again somehow.
Harvey had paused afterward, too.
Just enough to notice.
Just enough for me to notice him noticing.
Then the clip ended abruptly with Tyler screaming because somebody stole a golf cart outside.
Harvey grabbed the remote immediately and shut the TV off.
Okay.
He said firmly.
Nobody speaks about this ever again.
Too late.
Tyler said happily.
I already sent clips to the group chat.
Harvey looked genuinely devastated.
I laughed again, unable to help it.
He turned toward me instantly.
You think this is funny?
A little.
You fake married me to an ice swan.
You called me your soulmate.
You slow danced with me.
You dipped me.
Tyler held up his phone.
Actually, you both looked weirdly happy.
Neither of us answered that.
The silence stretched a little too long.
Then Harvey stood abruptly.
Coffee.
Now.
He started walking toward the door before the handcuffs yanked me along after him.
Dude, warning next time.
Sorry.
Tyler was still laughing as we stumbled out into the hallway together.
The hotel corridor was painfully bright.
Every sound echoed directly into my skull.
Harvey walked slightly ahead of me at first.
But after nearly pulling my arm out twice, he slowed down enough for us to move side by side.
It should have been awkward.
Honestly, it was awkward.
But there was also something stupidly intimate about it.
Like we were operating on instinct without talking.
Adjusting automatically to each other’s pace.
Moving around corners together.
Reaching doors at the same time.
Couple behavior.
I hated that my brain even thought that.
We reached the elevator and Harvey pressed the button with a sigh.
Then he leaned against the wall beside me.
Close.
Too close.
His shoulder brushed mine lightly.
Warm skin against warm skin.
And I suddenly became hyper aware of the fact he smelled ridiculously good for someone this hungover.
Soap, deodorant, and leftover cologne from last night.
Harvey glanced sideways at me.
You okay?
Yeah.
You look pale.
You look dead.
He snorted softly.
The elevator dinged open.
Inside were two middle-aged women holding coffees.
Both looked directly at our handcuffed wrists.
Then at our shirtless torsos.
Then at each other.
I wanted the earth to swallow me whole.
One of the women smiled knowingly.
Rough morning?
Harvey answered before I could.
Bachelor party.
Mhm.
She replied, clearly unconvinced.
The elevator ride lasted maybe 30 seconds.
Longest 30 seconds of my life.
The women kept sneaking glances at us while Harvey stared determinately at the floor.
I tried not to laugh again because the tips of his ears were turning red.
When we finally escaped into the lobby, Harvey groaned dramatically.
We need the key.
Right now?
Maybe hotel security has bolt cutters.
Maybe I jump into traffic.
Also an option.
He shot me a look.
I grinned despite myself.
For a second, Harvey just stared back at me before shaking his head with a quiet laugh.
And there it was again.
That weird tension.
The kind that had been happening more lately, even before the bachelor party.
Little things.
Harvey sitting too close on the couch.
His hand on my lower back steering me through crowded bars.
The way he’d started looking at me sometimes before quickly glancing away.
I’d ignored all of it because I had to.
Because if I started hoping for something impossible, I’d ruin everything.
Harvey was my best friend.
Losing him would destroy me.
We reached the hotel cafe and got coffee one-handed like complete idiots.
The barista openly smirked at us the entire time.
“Cute bracelets.”
She said.
Harvey looked ready to walk into the ocean.
We found an empty table near the windows.
As soon as we sat down, Harvey rubbed both hands over his face.
“I seriously don’t remember getting cuffed to you.”
“Maybe your subconscious is clingy.”
He looked at me over the rim of his coffee cup.
“You’re enjoying this way too much.”
“I’m enjoying your suffering specifically.”
“Wow.”
I smiled.
He smiled back automatically.
And then neither of us looked away.
Something shifted in my chest.
Harvey noticed it, too.
I could see it happen in real time.
His expression softening slightly before he blinked hard and looked down at his drink.
My heartbeat suddenly felt loud.
Then his phone buzzed.
Harvey grabbed it instantly like it saved him.
The moment he looked at the screen, his entire face changed.
“What?”
I asked.
He hesitated.
Then turned the phone toward me.
It was a text from his ex-girlfriend, Melanie.
“Melanie, you disappeared last night.
Are you seriously ignoring me now?”
I looked up from the phone slowly.
“Oh.”
Harvey immediately locked his screen again.
“Yeah.”
The mood shifted instantly.
Melanie.
Of course.
They’d broken up 3 weeks ago after nearly 2 years together.
Technically it was mutual, but everybody knew Harvey took it harder than he admitted.
He acted fine most of the time, but every now and then I’d catch him staring off into space or rereading old texts when he thought nobody noticed.
I hated how relieved part of me had been when they split, which made me feel like a terrible person.
You going to answer?
I asked carefully.
Harvey shrugged, staring down at his coffee.
I don’t know.
That surprised me.
Usually Harvey answered everyone immediately.
He hated conflict, hated leaving things unresolved.
You still mad at her?
It’s not that.
Then what?
He rubbed his jaw tiredly.
I just don’t think talking to her fixes anything.
I studied him quietly.
For the first time all morning, he looked genuinely exhausted beneath the hangover.
Not physically, emotionally.
Then he laughed once under his breath.
This is probably the lowest point of my life.
You being handcuffed to me?
No, he said.
The fact I’m weirdly okay with it.
My chest tightened before I could stop it.
Harvey glanced up like he realized how that sounded.
Then we both looked away at the exact same time.
Jesus Christ.
The tension between us felt dangerous now.
Before either of us could say anything else, Tyler suddenly appeared carrying breakfast sandwiches.
Good news, he announced proudly.
The hotel manager says if you idiots can’t find the key, maintenance can cut the cuffs off.
Harvey sighed in relief.
Finally.
Bad news, Tyler continued.
Maintenance guy doesn’t come in until 3:00.
Harvey stared at him blankly.
Check out is at noon.
Exactly.
I snorted into my coffee.
Harvey pointed at me accusingly.
You’re enjoying my pain again.
You make funny facial expressions when stressed.
Unbelievable.
Tyler dropped into the chair across from us.
Honestly though, this whole thing is adorable.
It’s not adorable.
Harvey muttered.
You literally cuddled in your sleep.
Both of us froze.
Tyler blinked innocently.
Oh.
Did I forget to mention that part?
Harvey looked horrified.
We did not cuddle.
You absolutely did.
I could physically feel heat climbing into my face.
Tyler pulled out his phone immediately.
Hold on, I have pictures.
No.
Harvey lunged across the table so fast I nearly choked laughing.
Too late.
Tyler already had the photo open.
And Oh.
My stomach flipped hard.
Because we really had been cuddling.
Harvey was asleep on his back against the hotel pillows while I was half sprawled against his chest.
One of his arms was around my waist under the blanket like it belonged there naturally.
Worse, we looked comfortable.
Not drunk chaos comfortable.
Real comfortable.
Like we’d slept that way a hundred times before.
Neither of us spoke for a second.
Then Harvey quietly grabbed Tyler’s phone and lowered it.
Delete that one.
Tyler’s teasing expression softened slightly.
Relax, man.
I didn’t send it to anyone.
Harvey nodded once.
I couldn’t stop staring at the table.
Because the picture had done something weird to me.
It looked right.
That was the problem.
Harvey stood abruptly again.
I need air.
The handcuffs jerked me upward with him.
Tyler smirked.
Have fun, newlyweds.
Harvey flipped him off without even turning around.
A few minutes later we ended up outside the hotel near the parking lot standing in the cool morning air.
The sunlight felt less murderous now and for a while either of us talked.
Cars passed.
Somebody across the street walked a tiny dog.
Normal life continued while my brain short-circuited beside my best friend.
Harvey leaned against the railing with a sigh.
Sorry about Tyler.
He’s not wrong.
I admitted before thinking.
Harvey looked over immediately.
About what part?
Damn it.
The cuddling thing.
I said carefully.
We looked comfortable.
His eyes stayed on mine longer than usual.
Yeah.
He said quietly.
We did.
The air suddenly felt heavier.
I swallowed hard.
Harvey looked away first staring out toward the street.
You know what’s weird?
What?
I don’t remember most of last night.
He paused.
But I remember dancing with you.
My pulse jumped.
What?
He shrugged slightly still not looking at me.
I remember everybody else being blurry.
But I remember you.
I didn’t know what to say to that.
Harvey laughed softly to himself.
That sounds insanely dramatic.
A little.
Yeah.
But neither of us smiled.
Then his phone buzzed again.
Another text from Melanie.
Harvey checked it automatically this time.
I watched his expression tighten slightly.
What now?
He hesitated before turning the screen toward me again.
Melanie.
Can you at least tell me where you are?
Tyler posted a story and people are tagging me in it.
Oh no.
I muttered.
Harvey rubbed his forehead.
This is going to be a nightmare.
Maybe don’t answer right now.
She’s already pissed.
You’re allowed to not deal with everything immediately.
He looked at me strangely after I said that.
What?
You always do that.
Do what?
Act like I deserve better than people give me.
The comment caught me completely off guard.
I frowned.
What’s that supposed to mean?
Harvey shrugged one shoulder awkwardly.
I don’t know.
You just always have my back.
My chest tightened painfully.
Obviously, I said quietly.
You’re my best friend.
There it was again.
That look.
The one that lingered too long.
Harvey’s eyes dropped briefly to my mouth before snapping back up.
It happened so fast I almost thought I imagined it.
Almost.
Then a loud whistle interrupted us.
We both turned.
One of the groomsmen leaned halfway out a hotel window upstairs yelling, “Wow!
The internet loves you guys.”
Harvey closed his eyes immediately.
I’m going to kill Tyler.
Too late, the guy shouted back.
The handcuff story already has like 12,000 views.
My jaw dropped.
What?
Harvey yelled.
The guy disappeared back inside laughing hysterically.
Harvey looked genuinely panicked now.
I grabbed my phone one-handed awkwardly while he leaned over my shoulder to look.
Sure enough, Tyler had uploaded a story captioned, “When the bachelor party gets too romantic.”
The comments were brutal.
“Just kiss already.”
“Those are not straight man hand placements.”
“Why do they look happier than most married couples?”
“The tension is insane.”
Harvey made a strangled noise beside me, but I couldn’t breathe properly because he was so close behind me now that his chest was against my shoulder.
And neither of us moved away.
Okay.
Harvey said finally, stepping back like he just remembered personal space existed.
We’re getting those storys deleted.
I locked my phone.
You realize that’s impossible, right?
Cavlin.
I’m serious.
Once the internet decides two idiots are secretly in love, it’s over.
Harvey stared at me.
Then he laughed.
A real laugh this time.
Loud enough that a couple walking past looked over.
Why is that funny?
I asked.
Because you said it so casually.
I crossed my arms.
It’s true.
He grinned at me for another second before his expression softened again.
God, I needed him to stop looking at me like that.
It was getting harder to pretend I didn’t want something I couldn’t have.
Come on.
Harvey said eventually.
Let’s go figure out the key situation before Tyler starts selling wedding invitations.
We headed back upstairs together, moving more naturally now despite the cuffs.
At some point we’d unconsciously figured out how to walk in sync without bumping into each other every 3 seconds.
That somehow made everything worse.
Because it felt weirdly domestic.
Back inside the suite, the rest of the guys were finally awake.
The room smelled like hangover breath and regret.
Tyler looked up from the couch immediately.
Good news.
Harvey narrowed his eyes.
You’ve lost the privilege of saying that phrase.
The maintenance guy might come early.
Might?
He said maybe one.
Harvey dropped dramatically into a chair.
I hate all of you.
Love you, too.
Tyler replied.
One of the other groomsmen pointed toward us.
You guys seriously haven’t killed each other yet?
Not yet.
I said.
Harvey glanced at me sideways.
We’re surprisingly functional.
That’s because you’re basically an old married couple already.
Another guy said.
The room erupted with laughter.
I rolled my eyes, but Harvey suddenly got very interested in opening a water bottle.
Interesting.
Tyler noticed, too.
His grin slowly widened.
Wait.
No.
Harvey said immediately.
You’re blushing.
I’m hungover.
Harvey Thomas.
Tyler.
Oh my god.
Tyler sat upright like he’d discovered buried treasure.
You two have feelings for each other.
The entire room exploded.
What?
I choked.
Harvey looked ready to launch himself out the window.
Tyler pointed between us wildly.
I knew it.
Nobody cuddles like that platonically.
It was drunk sleeping.
Harvey argued weakly.
You stare at him constantly.
That’s not true.
It absolutely is.
Another guy added.
Harvey looked betrayed.
Whose side are you on?
The truth’s side.
I wanted to disappear.
Because the worst part nobody was really joking anymore.
Not fully.
There was this shift in the room where suddenly everyone was looking at us like they’d noticed something before we had.
Or before we admitted it.
Harvey stood abruptly again.
Okay.
New rule.
Nobody psychoanalyzes me until I’ve eaten carbs.
That’s fair.
Tyler admitted.
The conversation finally moved on after that.
But the damage was done.
I couldn’t stop thinking about it.
Feelings.
Plural.
The terrifying thing was I already knew mine were real.
Had been for years.
But Harvey?
No chance.
Probably just leftover emotions from his breakup mixed with alcohol and closeness and bachelor party case.
That had to be it.
A couple hours later, the group finally started cleaning the suite before checkout.
Since Harvey and I were literally attached at the wrist, every task became unnecessarily complicated.
Holding trash bags together.
Trying to make the bed together.
Accidentally bumping hips every 30 seconds.
At one point Harvey reached across me for an empty beer bottle and his hand landed briefly on my waist for balance.
Neither of us moved immediately.
His fingers tightened slightly through my shirt.
Then he looked up and realized how close we were.
My breath caught.
We were standing chest to chest now beside the bed, both suddenly very still.
The room around us blurred into background noise.
Harvey’s eyes flicked down to my mouth again.
Definitely not imagining that one.
My pulse hammered so hard it hurt.
Then Tyler loudly dropped something across the room and the moment shattered instantly.
Harvey stepped back fast.
Too fast.
Sorry.
He muttered.
For what?
He opened his mouth.
Closed it again.
Then nothing.
That somehow felt worse.
By noon everybody else headed downstairs while Harvey and I waited for the maintenance guy.
The suite was finally quiet for the first time all day.
And somehow that was more dangerous.
Harvey sat beside me on the couch, elbows resting on his knees.
You know what Tyler said earlier?
Don’t he interrupted immediately.
I blinked.
I was going to say he’s an idiot.
Oh.
Silence.
Then Harvey rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly.
Right.
I studied him carefully.
He looked nervous.
Harvey never got nervous around me.
What’s going on with you?
I asked quietly.
He looked over slowly.
What do you mean?
You’ve been acting weird for weeks.
His expression shifted instantly.
Weird how?
Different.
Harvey laughed once under his breath.
That’s specific.
You know what I mean.
He held my gaze for a long moment before looking away again.
And then quietly, What if I do?
My heart nearly stopped.
What?
Harvey swallowed hard.
What if I know what you mean?
The room suddenly felt too small.
I stared at him unable to think straight.
Harvey’s jaw tightened slightly like he regretted saying it already.
Then someone knocked loudly at the suite door.
Both of us jumped apart like guilty teenagers.
Tyler poked his head inside immediately.
Maintenance guy’s here.
Harvey stood so fast he nearly dragged me off the couch.
The maintenance worker looked deeply unimpressed by us.
You boys lose the key?
Yes.
Harvey said flatly.
The guy sighed like this happened hourly.
A few seconds later, the cuffs finally snapped apart.
Freedom.
My wrist felt strangely light afterward.
Harvey rubbed his skin where the metal had been.
Then looked at me.
And for some reason, neither of us moved.
It hit me all at once then.
The handcuffs had been stupid, embarrassing, chaotic.
But somewhere in the middle of all that, I’d gotten used to being close to him.
Too used to it.
Harvey seemed to feel it too because he kept staring at me with this unreadable expression.
Then Tyler ruined everything again.
Well, he announced proudly, “Guess the honeymoon’s over.”
“Tyler,” Harvey said slowly, “I need you to understand that murder becomes legal at bachelor parties.”
Tyler grinned.
“Worth it.”
The guys finally headed downstairs with the luggage while Harvey and I stayed behind for one last sweep of the room.
The silence between us felt completely different now.
Before, it had been easy.
Now every glance felt loaded.
Every accidental touch lingered too long.
I bent down to grab my overnight bag at the same time Harvey reached for his jacket, and we bumped shoulders again.
“Sorry,” we both said instantly, then laughed awkwardly.
“Jesus Christ.”
Harvey rubbed the back of his neck.
“This is weird now.”
My stomach dropped.
“Yeah, I didn’t mean” He stopped himself.
“I just mean after everything Tyler said.”
I forced a nod even though disappointment hit harder than it should have.
“Right.
Of course.”
Harvey noticed my expression immediately.
“Cavlin, it’s fine.”
“No, you thought I meant” The elevator dinged loudly outside before he could finish.
Perfect timing.
A few minutes later we were all downstairs checking out of the hotel.
Tyler was still living his best life reading comments aloud from the viral story.
“The chemistry is actually insane.”
“Tyler,” Harvey warned.
“They look one argument away from making out.”
Harvey looked ready to fight him physically.
I was trying very hard not to think about how accurate that sounded.
Outside, everybody split up toward their cars.
Most of the guys were heading home, but Harvey and I still had the 2-hour drive back to the city together.
Just us.
Alone.
Fantastic.
Harvey tossed our bags into the trunk of his SUV while I climbed into the passenger seat.
The second the doors shut, silence filled the car immediately.
Not normal silence.
Heavy silence.
Harvey started the engine without looking at me.
I watched him grip the steering wheel tighter than necessary.
“You okay?”
I asked quietly.
“Yeah.”
Liar.
We pulled onto the highway.
For the first 20 minutes, the only sounds were the tires against pavement and low music from the radio.
Then Harvey suddenly sighed.
“I didn’t mean what I said like that.”
I turned toward him carefully.
“What did you mean?”
He kept his eyes on the road.
“Earlier.”
“In the hotel room.”
My pulse jumped instantly.
“Oh.”
Harvey swallowed hard.
“I just meant things feel weird because now everybody’s making jokes.”
Right.
But even saying it, I knew that wasn’t the full truth.
Harvey was tense.
Nervous.
Like he was trying very hard not to say something else.
I stared out the window instead.
“You don’t have to explain.”
“Yeah, I do.”
The seriousness in his voice surprised me.
I looked back at him.
Harvey finally glanced over briefly before looking away again.
“You’re my best friend.”
He said quietly.
“Last thing I ever want is to make you uncomfortable.”
That hurt more than I expected.
Because uncomfortable wasn’t even remotely the problem.
“I’m not uncomfortable.”
I admitted before I could stop myself.
Harvey went very still beside me.
The SUV drifted slightly before he corrected it.
“You’re not?”
“No.”
Another long silence.
Then Harvey laughed softly under his breath, almost nervous.
“This conversation feels dangerous.
You started it.
I know.
He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel for a few seconds before speaking again.
Can I ask you something?
Sure.
Harvey hesitated so long I thought he changed his mind.
Then finally, have you ever He exhaled sharply.
Have you ever thought about me like that?
My heart stopped.
Straight up stopped.
I stared at him in complete shock.
Harvey immediately looked panicked.
Forget I asked.
No.
He tightened his grip on the wheel.
No.
I swallowed hard.
No, don’t forget it.
The air inside the car suddenly felt electric.
Harvey’s voice dropped quieter.
So answer me.
I should have lied.
I really should have.
Because this was Harvey.
And once you say something out loud, you can’t take it back.
But I was tired.
Tired of pretending.
Tired of acting like I didn’t notice every little thing about him.
So I looked down at my hands and quietly said, “Yeah.”
The car went completely silent.
No music now.
Just road noise and my heartbeat trying to punch through my ribs.
Harvey didn’t say anything for several seconds.
Then, “How long?”
I laughed nervously.
“You really want to know that?”
“Yes.”
I stared out the windshield.
“A while.”
“How long is a while?”
“Harvey.”
“Cavlin.”
I closed my eyes briefly.
“Since college.”
The words hung there between us.
Heavy.
Real.
Harvey’s breathing changed slightly beside me.
I felt sick suddenly.
Like maybe I just ruined everything in one sentence.
“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”
He asked quietly.
“Because you were straight.
He didn’t answer immediately.
Then very softly.
I thought I was.
I turned toward him so fast my seatbelt locked.
What?
Harvey looked terrified after saying it.
Like he couldn’t believe the words came out either.
I don’t know.
He admitted quickly.
Okay.
I don’t know what the hell’s been going on with me lately.
My chest felt painfully tight.
Harvey kept talking now like if he stopped, he’d lose the nerve completely.
Ever since Melanie and I broke up, I’ve been thinking about things differently and then this weekend happened and He laughed shakily.
You have no idea how hard it’s been not to kiss you today.
Everything inside me froze.
The SUV was still moving down the highway.
But suddenly it felt like the entire world narrowed down to just him.
Harvey glanced over finally.
His eyes were nervous.
Open.
Honest.
And very, very serious.
You can tell me to shut up.
He said quietly.
Honestly, maybe I should shut up.
Harvey.
He stopped talking instantly.
I stared at him.
Then at his mouth.
Then back to his eyes.
And apparently that was answer enough because Harvey suddenly pulled the SUV onto the highway shoulder a second later.
My heart slammed against my ribs.
Cars rushed past us loudly.
Neither of us moved at first.
Harvey looked almost stunned at himself for stopping.
This is insane.
He muttered.
A little.
I’ve never done this before.
I know.
His eyes searched mine carefully.
You sure?
I nodded once.
That was all it took.
Harvey grabbed my shirt and kissed me.
I’d imagined kissing Harvey before.
Way more times than I should have.
But none of those fantasies came close to the real thing.
Because Harvey kissed me like he’d been holding himself back for a long time.
His hand tightened in my shirt as his mouth crashed against mine.
Rough and nervous at first, like he expected me to pull away.
The second I kissed him back, he made this quiet sound in his throat that nearly destroyed me.
Holy He breathed against my mouth.
My hands grabbed his jaw automatically, pulling him closer again before I could think.
Harvey kissed hard.
Messy.
Desperate.
Like all the tension from the past few weeks finally snapped at once.
Cars kept flying past outside, but I barely heard them.
All I could focus on was him.
The warmth of his hand at my waist.
His thumb pressing against my side.
The way he kept kissing me like he couldn’t believe I was actually letting him.
Then suddenly Harvey pulled back just enough to stare at me.
His pupils were blown wide.
Cavlin.
He said quietly, almost stunned.
I could barely breathe.
Yeah?
I really wanted to do that.
I laughed shakily.
I noticed.
He smiled then.
And God.
That smile hit completely different after kissing him.
Harvey leaned forward again, slower this time, resting his forehead against mine.
This is insane.
He whispered.
You said that already.
I mean it more now.
I grinned despite myself.
Then Harvey kissed me again, softer this time.
Less frantic.
More intentional.
And somehow that was even worse for my heart.
Because now I could feel every little thing.
The way his fingers brushed lightly against my neck.
The hitch in his breathing when I touched his hair.
The fact he kept smiling into the kiss like he physically couldn’t stop.
When we finally pulled apart again, neither of us moved far.
Harvey stared at me for a long second before laughing under his breath.
What?
I’m trying to process the fact I pulled over on the side of a highway to make out with my best friend.
You forgot the part where we were handcuffed together this morning.
He groaned immediately.
Don’t remind me.
I laughed.
Harvey just kept looking at me though.
Different now.
Openly.
And it made my chest ache in the best way.
Then reality slowly started creeping back in.
Harvey noticed it, too.
His expression shifted slightly.
Okay.
We should probably talk before we completely lose our minds.
Probably.
Neither of us moved.
Harvey smiled faintly.
We are very bad at talking.
Historically?
Yeah.
He leaned back against the seat finally with a long exhale.
I don’t know what this means yet.
He admitted honestly.
But I know I’m not joking.
I nodded quietly.
That’s enough for me.
Harvey’s eyes softened immediately at that.
You really liked me that long?
I looked away, suddenly embarrassed now that everything was real.
Unfortunately.
He laughed softly.
Why unfortunately?
Because you were impossible to get over.
That shut him up for a second.
Then very quietly.
No one’s ever said something like that about me before.
The honesty in his voice hit me hard.
I looked back at him.
Seriously?
Harvey shrugged awkwardly.
Most people just like the easy version of me.
That’s because most people didn’t know you.
He stared at me again after that.
Like he was trying to memorize my face.
Then his phone buzzed loudly between us and ruined the moment completely.
We both looked down.
Melanie.
Again.
Harvey sighed immediately.
You should answer her.
I said gently.
He rubbed his face.
Yeah.
For a second I wondered if this was the part where reality hit him fully and he realized kissing me was a mistake.
But instead Harvey looked at me carefully first.
You okay?
With what?
This.
I understood what he meant immediately.
Melanie.
The ex-girlfriend.
The fact Harvey’s entire life just got complicated overnight.
I nodded once.
Yeah.
He studied my face like he was checking if I was lying.
Then finally answered the call.
Hey.
I tried very hard not to listen, staring out the windshield while Harvey talked quietly beside me.
At first he mostly listened while Melanie vented.
I caught phrases here and there.
Not ignoring you.
Bachelor party disaster.
Videos are embarrassing.
Then there was a long silence while Harvey listened again.
His expression tightened slightly.
Finally he sighed.
No, Mel.
I don’t think getting back together is a good idea.
My stomach flipped.
Harvey glanced at me briefly while saying it.
I know.
He continued softly.
I’m sorry.
Another silence.
Then.
No.
There isn’t someone else.
A beat passed.
Harvey laughed once under his breath and rubbed his forehead.
I honestly don’t even know what I’m doing yet.
That one felt directed at me, too.
A few minutes later the call finally ended.
Harvey tossed the phone onto the dashboard and leaned his head back dramatically.
Well.
He muttered.
That was rough.
You okay?
Yeah.
He looked over at me.
Actually, weirdly, yeah.
I smiled slightly.
Harvey reached over and grabbed my hand without hesitation this time.
The simple contact almost hurt more than the kissing because it felt natural.
Like we’d skipped past awkward somehow and landed somewhere honest instead.
He intertwined our fingers slowly, then smirked a little.
You realize Tyler’s never shutting up about this.
I groaned instantly.
He’s going to be unbearable.
He’s probably already planning our wedding hashtag.
I laughed.
Harvey squeezed my hand once gently.
Then his expression softened again.
Hey.
Yeah?
I’m really glad it was you.
My chest tightened painfully.
Before I could answer, Harvey leaned over and kissed me one more time.
Slow, warm, certain.
And this time when he pulled away, either of us looked scared anymore.
By the time we got back to the city, Harvey and I had kissed four more times.
Not that we were counting.
Okay, we were definitely counting.
The first was at a gas station because Harvey claimed I distracted him while he was paying for snacks.
The second happened at a red light.
The third lasted long enough that someone honked behind us.
The fourth happened in his apartment parking garage after we sat there silently for almost 2 minutes pretending neither of us wanted to move.
Now we were standing beside his SUV with our bags at our feet, both looking slightly wrecked in the best possible way.
Harvey rubbed the back of his neck.
So.
So.
He laughed softly.
I feel like we skipped several emotional steps today.
You mean between waking up handcuffed together and making out on a highway shoulder?
Exactly.
I smiled despite myself.
Then Harvey’s expression turned more serious.
I meant what I said earlier.
About Tyler planning our wedding hashtag?
He snorted.
No, idiot.
His eyes softened.
About being glad it was you.
That hit me right in the chest again.
Because I knew exactly what he meant now.
All the confusion.
All the panic.
The terrifying realization that maybe his feelings weren’t as simple as he thought they were.
And somehow, despite all that, Harvey still looked relieved.
Relieved it was me.
I’m glad, too.
I admitted quietly.
Harvey stared at me for a second like he still couldn’t fully believe this was happening.
Then he stepped closer.
So, what now?
That was the terrifying question, honestly.
Because Harvey wasn’t just some random guy I’d gotten involved with after too many drinks.
He was woven into my entire life.
My best friend.
The person I called first with good news.
The person who knew exactly how I took my coffee, and which movies made me emotional, and how to calm me down when my anxiety got bad.
Losing him would have destroyed me.
But standing there now, looking at him after everything that happened today, I realized I already loved him too much to go backward.
I think I said carefully, we’ll figure it out.
Harvey nodded slowly.
Together?
The word hit hard.
Yeah.
I said quietly, together.
His smile after that nearly killed me.
Then his phone buzzed again.
We both groaned instantly.
Tyler.
Harvey answered on speaker immediately.
If you say honeymoon one more time, I’m blocking you forever.
Tyler screamed loud enough to distort the audio.
You kissed him?
Harvey froze.
I burst out laughing.
How do you know?
Harvey demanded.
Because Cavlin looks like he got hit by a romantic truck.
That doesn’t even mean anything.
I said.
It means you’re smiling like an idiot.
Harvey looked over at me automatically.
Then started smiling, too.
Tyler made the loudest gasp I’ve ever heard.
Oh my god!
He whispered dramatically.
It’s real.
Tyler.
I knew it.
Harvey pinched the bridge of his nose.
You are never allowed near alcohol again.
No, no, forget that.
I need details immediately.
Which one of you made the first move?
We both answered at the same time.
He did.
Then we looked at each other.
And started laughing.
Tyler shrieked.
That is disgustingly cute.
Goodbye, Tyler.
Harvey hung up before he could say anything else.
The parking garage fell quiet again.
I shook my head.
We’re never hearing the end of this.
Absolutely not.
Harvey stepped closer until our shoes almost touched.
Then he looked at me with that same soft expression he’d had in the car.
You know what’s crazy?
What?
If we hadn’t gotten drunk and handcuffed ourselves together.
You probably still wouldn’t know I liked you.
Exactly.
I grinned.
That’s a terrifying thought.
Harvey laughed softly.
Then his fingers brushed against mine.
Tentative for maybe half a second before he fully intertwined our hands again.
Easy.
Natural.
Like we’d been doing it forever.
I spent years thinking you were out of my league.
He admitted suddenly.
I stared at him in disbelief.
Harvey.
I’m serious.
You’re objectively insane.
He smiled shyly.
Actually shyly.
I’d never seen that look on him before.
I don’t know.
He admitted.
You always seemed impossible.
That completely wrecked me because I thought the exact same thing about him.
So I stepped forward, grabbed his shirt, and kissed him again.
Harvey made that same quiet sound against my mouth immediately before kissing me back harder.
And this time there was no panic in it.
No confusion.
Just him.
When we finally pulled apart, both of us were smiling like idiots.
Harvey rested his forehead against mine and laughed quietly.
Still can’t believe we woke up handcuffed together.
I grinned.
Honestly, might be the best thing we’ve ever done.
He looked at me for one long second, then kissed me one more time before whispering, Ride or die, remember?
